wanderlust

girl disconnected

i always kind of liked being unreachable
when overseas.
anywhere international,
meant i was un-tethered to the “real world”
my world.
i mean i hated that i had a radius
a short distance & practiced route
to get me to & from the hotel
so i wouldn’t get lost.
but at least i couldn’t be bothered
distracted
when i was away.

but you went & got me an international data plan
because you know i have a tendency
of getting lost
[even on practiced streets]
so i could be reachable
if i wanted to be.

& instead of feeling tied down
restricted
tethered by a leash thats been shortened with this newfound accessibility
i felt even freer.
because when i saw the snow fall in Japan
i could tell you i was thinking of you.
when i tasted the most amazing dessert in Australia
i could send you a photo of it, & tell you to come with me next time to try it for yourself.

because the difference is,
everything i wander towards
& around
i want to share with you.
because you are my world.

i get so lost inside these cities…

I’m definitely an independent explorer

& as advantageous as it is to wander in numbers, I don’t ever feel I can be completely myself & take in each new city with unspoiled eyes.

we’re just not being honest with each other when we’re absorbed in others’ company.

so instead I stick to daylight adventures
& hole up in my room in the evenings

my comfort food has become thai food from whatever the closest 3+ starred restaurant on yelp is.

every layover I’ve had, I find myself indulging in my favorites entrees: spicy eggplant, pad kee maw, or yellow curry with sticky rice.

something about it grounds me.
despite living like the serena van der woodsens of the world
hotel to hotel
with balconies always bearing a different view
of new cities im not yet familiar with

hello there
id like to know you
every season
every shade of you.

40,000ft in the air

Sometimes i wonder if my career will eventually desensitize me to my love of traveling
living day to day in different cities
continents apart
“the world must seem so much smaller to you now huh?” i was asked
“actually, it feels so much bigger. i visit cities i’d never thought i’d want to visit in a lifetime” i replied.
but i think i miss,
the way traveling was a luxury
even an anxiety
before.
the way airports gave me goosebumps
& i would savor the experience,
even down to the prepackaged nuts
because i wouldn’t know when the next time i’d enjoy them would be.
i listen in on pockets of eager early morning conversations in line at the airport Starbucks
lusting over all the excursions they’re going to embark on once they land,
or reminiscing about all the experiences they’ve just had as they head back home.
sometimes i witness the travel bug symptom of guests being extra nice to each other
because they know their prepaid vacation’s outcome hangs in the balance of getting along with their siblings, their seat neighbor, their husband or wife… & no one wants moods soured over something so trivial in the grand scheme of Disneyland, NY Times Square, or some other highly sought destination.

self, dont let this routine take away the wonderment of exploring
remember this.

– mm.